That's NOT All Folks

I had a follow up appointment with the diabetes ladies at the hospital this week to check how my glucose levels were going. I am on a medication that causes high blood sugar and so my levels have not been great and they decided to put me on insulin to help get my levels under control.

So now I am taking two types of insulin three times a day. Fun times!

We are hoping that in a couple of weeks when I stop taking this other medication, that I might be able to stop the insulin also but we will have to wait and see.

I take two doses of a fast acting insulin right before lunch and dinner, which is a fancy looking pen, and then a slow acting one at bedtime which looks like an egg time from the 80's.

I feel like a bit of a pin cushion at the moment with four blood tests and three injections daily. I am having to time and monitor soo much that it's like i'm not getting anything else done during the day.

I expected that they would put me on insulin when I went back. Nothing in this pregnancy has been easy and I could see by my levels that just diet and exercise weren't going to be enough to keep things under control.

They showed me what I needed to do each time and I was ok with everything until the moment they handed me 2 pens, 14 needles and a heap of paperwork/information... That's when it all sunk in and the tears started.

I had my moment then I got my shit together and headed back to work. The first injection was right before dinner. BJ got home and we served up our plates. I have to eat immediately after because it's a fast acting insulin. Once my plate was ready I prepared my pen and went to injection myself in the tummy. But I couldn't do it. Panic set in and the tears began again. I felt so bad for BJ having to watch me as I know it couldn't have been easy.

He offered to do it for me but I wiped away the tears and went for it and you know what... It wasn't that bad. I think the blood test needles hurt way more then the insulin. That made me feel a little better about it all.

I am frustrated about the whole thing but at the same time this is going to help make me healthy and in turn keep my baby girl safe. It's just a lot to take in. I keep feeling like the worst has happened and things should start to get better from here and THEN something new arises.

I am so over appointments but with 10 weeks to go I still have quiet a few to get through. At least with the insulin the hospital will call and monitor me over the phone every couple of days and adjust my insulin accordingly. I have a follow up in 2 weeks and also an ultrasound to check the babies growth and make sure everything is alright. Crossing my fingers that we can get this under control.

I tell you what though, after all this if her first word is 'Dada' i'm going to be really pissed off!!

My bag of goodies

xx

Smorgy

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Lucky Me?

What do you give the girl who already has sooo much?? Gestational Diabetes.... of course!!!

A week ago I had my glucose tolerance test and I honestly didn't think anything would come of it and then that afternoon I get a call from the hospital.

Nurse: "You have gestational diabetes"
Me: 'Haha of course I do!"

Only 3-8% of women develop it so naturally I was going to one of the lucky few.

So now on top of what seems like never ending appointments, I have to go to the hospital and sit in a seminar to learn about about my new found diabetes and be shown how to monitor my levels and keep it under control. I will be given a monitor and will need to prick my finger and test my sugar levels multiple times a day.

For those who don't know gestational diabetes is something that can develop during pregnancy and will usually go away once the baby is born but if you don't monitor it, it could cause the baby to grow quite a lot and could lead to type 2 diabetes for both you and baby in the future. Fun stuff.

29 weeks today. Is it over yet?!

Mmm sugary sweetness at 9am on an empty tummy

xx

Smorgy

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No I am not stealing produce

I might look like I'm trying to steal a head of lettuce under my shirt but I'm just 26 weeks pregnant. My baby has grown and it is obvious to others now instead of just looking like I had a massive dinner.

Last week BJ felt the baby kicking for the first time and the look on his face was amazing! It was so great to see him smile and look genuinely happy and excited about what he'd just felt.

Since then she always seems to stop when he tries to feel her kicks. But for me it feels like she never stops. Constantly turning, kicking and stretching.

This year has been rough and it's nice to have a moment where we could both forget about all the shit thats going on and smile about whats to come.

I am now rockin' the maternity pants and my tshirts are getting quite tight. Adding the word 'maternity' to things is like adding the word 'wedding'.... The prices goes waaay up. Sure Target has a maternity section, which is reasonably price but you have to be a size 8 and be ok with wearing fuckin' ugly clothes.

On the other hand though Target have some adorable baby clothes. We were there on Saturday and randomly decided to purchase some little outfits. Squirrels, watermelon and cacti on tiny little baby clothes, what could be better?

Oh and I got this sweet maternity jumper. (Please ignore my tired face, I had a horrible sinus infection at the time)

xx

Smorgy

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A Full Plate

So far in 2015 I have found out I was pregnant, suffered from hyperemesis gravidarum (severe morning sickness), struggled with every day things like work and doing dishes, eating proper meals, prepared our house to go on the market and sold it. 

It has really been a crazy, busy year so far and we still have so much more on our list before this baby arrives in September. The most important thing is finding a new home and moving in the next couple of months.

I have been pretty upfront and honest about my struggles through this pregnancy. When people ask me how I am I generally sugar coat it but if they ask more in depth questions I answer them truthfully. I have had many a day lately where I have thoughts about our decision to try and get pregnant and wonder if we made the right one. And I can honestly say that I do not enjoy being pregnant at all. It has not been an experience I will look back on and cherish.

I know it's going to be a distant memory once the baby comes but right now it's full on.

I'm 24 weeks along and am starting to look pregnant. The belly no longer stays hidden. I'm really self conscious about it and I am not looking forward to people grabbing at it. 

I do however I really like the look on BJ's face when he see's it. He has a look of happiness and excitement, which is nice to see.

I am TRYING to focus on the positives of this pregnancy. The main obviously being a happy, healthy baby girl at the end of it all. Our eyes were a bit bigger then our stomach when we filled our plates this year.

xx
Smorgy

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Dem Pregnant Feelz

I honestly thought that I would be waaay more emotional when I got pregnant.

Don't get me wrong. I've had some emotional breakdowns over the past couple of months but I thought with all the hormones going crazy inside me that I'd just start crying uncontrollably or getting mad over stupid little things.

For the most part this hasn't been the case. Even though I have been soo frustrated, feeling sick all the time I haven't had too many moments where I felt like 'Why did I just start crying?!'

One evening I had a panic attack come out of nowhere. The only reason I can think of is because I struggling to eat the dinner BJ had prepared for me. I ended up getting into such a state that I vomited what little I had eaten and then I cried for about an hour because I broke my puke streak.

And on one of the days that I wasn't able to do much of anything due to lack of energy and feeling like death, I found myself crying in bed while I watched this video on my phone.

It's the stupidest thing and I have no idea why but even now just checking that I had the right video, I've gotten a little teary. 

Damn you Bruno Mars!

xx

Smorgy

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Touring September 2015

A week ago BJ and I decided to announce our big 2015 news and we were overwhelmed with the a bombardment of congratulations, excitement and support. Thank you everyone!

I am now just shy of 14 weeks pregnant and let me tell you it has been a rough couple of months. BJ and I have known since I was only 4 weeks along and in week 5 I was already starting to feel quite under the weather. By week 7 I couldn't keep much food down and when week 8 hit I couldn't even stomach anything, not even water. 

Week 9 began with me going to the emergency room for some much needed fluids. A 3 hour wait before I was given a bed, by this point it was 10pm. I was soo dry that it took 4 attempts before the they successfully got a vein... and then the fluids began. After the first bag i felt hungry and got given some midnight sandwiches. The second bag of fluids had me drinking water again and after the third I was feeling much better.

That was a rough night. BJ was home looking after the boys and worrying about me while mum was by my side asleep in an uncomfortable armchair. She stayed with me until 7.30am the next morning then not long after BJ joined me and entertained me until it was time to go home.

I was covered in bruises and still feel very weak and empty, which isn't surprising since I lost about 10kg over my first trimester. But after some good advice from the doctor I finally found the way to manage how I was feeling. 

I have missed quite a lot of work these last two months which has not helped me feel better because I'm constantly worrying about falling behind (which I have... A LOT!)

My mum (and Boss) has been soo supportive and helpful throughout all this and I'm soo thankful for that.

But I have also had BJ here looking after me. He has stepped up and just taken control of our household. From the food shops to cooking dinners to cleaning and running around for me. He has been soo amazing. I'm pretty lucky. 

Each week he will come who with the shopping and a special treat for me to try and make me feel better. He's kept the washing under control and this week he even did a heap of painting. He makes my lunch and fills my scripts. He is the best husband I could ask for and I am so lucky to have him while I go through all this.

Right now I can hear him cleaning and organising stuff in the other room while I lay here in bed at 11.37am on a Saturday with my two fluffy boys cuddling up with me for warmth, nibbling on original potato chips for breakfast because that's what the baby wants. 

I hoped that when we finally told everyone a weight would be lifted and I would just start feeling back to normal. I am definitely better then I have been but still have a bit to go before I can get myself moving in the mornings and cook my own food and just stand on my feet for more then 5 minutes. 

I haven't been able to write about anything lately, stayed pretty quiet on Facebook because the only thing I had to say was that I felt sick. It was a challenge to keep the secret, a lot of family members guessed because the 'Megan's sick' excuse got a bit old very quickly. Fork This has been on a hiatus because we really haven't been doing anything worth filming. 

I hope that all that will change soon. 

xx

Smorgy

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