Tuesday, May 31, 2011

That's a keeper!

I'm one of those people that keeps everything. Good or bad, i have a a hard copy, a soft copy and a few backups. I don't know why i've just always kept things. 
I think it's because weather the memory is good or bad, i dont want to forget the things that have happened in my life.

Tonight i was browsing through some old logos and things i've designed over the years and i came across a comic i did in 2006. It was called 'Mutilated Lips'. There were 8 in total but looking back i only really like 6 of them. 

I thought i'd share the first one with you guys.



Let me know what you think of my strange comic.
xx
Smorgy

PS: I also re-arranged my blog layout a bit and added some badges for other blogs and sites i like. If you would like yours on their, email me a badge and ill get it up :)
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Thursday, May 5, 2011

Honesty


I recently decided to start up a diary again. It’s been years since I had one and I’ve kind of gotten to a point where I need to get a lot of things out on to paper. (virtual paper)

The last couple of months I’ve been struggling a lot, with myself. I’ve had no motivation to craft or do anything that i really enjoy - and it doesn’t seem to be getting any easier.

I’ve had a lot of history come to the surface, a lot of personal things to sort through, a car accident in my 6 month old baby, my puppy having an operation and other bits and pieces that have really brought me down.

I’ve come to realise that I only have one friendship that is there for me always and helps me when I’m down. I don’t have anyone that I can just call up last minute and go hang out with. I seem to just have a lot of acquaintances but very few friends and that’s making life hard.

I make all these beautiful pieces of jewelry which I’m really happy with and I think are awesome, but I have no one to give them to.

I know that everyone has it tough and I’m not THAT person who thinks that there life is the worst and everyone should feel sorry for them… and that’s the last thing I want. But the past 10 years of my life have been a total roller coaster. I’ve lost a lot of people who I cared a great deal about. Some in death, some in disagreements, but a lot of them I couldn’t tell you why because I don’t know myself. (I wish I did)

I do so much for the people in my life, the people who mean something to me. At the drop of a hat I am there for them, they need something made – I do it right away, I am supporting them every way I can… But I don’t seem to get anything in return. All I want is a thank you but mostly; I get nothing.

I’ve given up on going all out and giving 100% to people that just don’t support me back.

I’ve decided to set some goals for this year to improve my head space and get me enjoying life again:

  1. If something is bothering me, im going to say something. Im not going to bite my tongue and just pretend there’s nothing wrong.

  2. I’m going to spend more time doing things for me. Im all about helping friends/family, but I need some time for myself too and when they don’t help me why so I put in soo much of an effort?!

  3. I am going to re-design my website. I’ve hated it since about a month after I launched it… I don’t think anyone goes there and I want to change that.

  4. I’m going to craft more. This works with ‘2’ because having some time for myself means that I CAN do ‘4’.

  5. Im going to try and focus on the positive things in life.

These five goals are a starting point. I have more that I a bit too personal to post. Im going to try and accomplish these goals and improve where im at currently.

I’ve been reminded recently that this year I turn 25.

I just don’t know where the years have gone and I want to be able to look back in another 10 years and see that I am no longer where I am now. That I am a happier, confident and positive person.

Im sorry about posting that on a blog that is ment for craft but I don’t think anyone actually reads my blogs anyway and I had to get this out into the world.

xx
Smorgy 


I dont want to be this person anymore

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