Sunday, July 31, 2011

When 10 years still only feels like a day

I've tried to make my blogging, tweeting and facebooking more positive lately. And I will try to make this blog as positive as i can.


For a lot of people who know me, many of you don't know what I've been though and had to live with. Even though it was in the papers, on the news etc there are still people out there who aren't aware of my story.
Today i'm going to share it with you all as I feel it's the right thing to do.


Beanca's 1st Birthday
10 years ago my 18 month old niece Beanca was murdered by her mother. Beanca and her brother Chris were taken by there mother one day while my brother was at work and 6 months went without us know where they were until we recieved a call with terrible news.

My mum and brother flew up to Queensland which is where she'd taken the kids and brought Chris back home with them.

Their mother was hog tying them at night so they wouldn't get up and bother her. The night that Beanca died, she had been tied up for 16 hours and during this time she'd rolled over and suffocated in her bed.

Mother and boyfriend were sentenced to 6 years for manslaughter and she was out in 3. Free to live her life as if nothing had happened.
I don't believe 6 years was a fair sentence at all. 10 years have passed and my family are still trying to put our lives back together.



Chris - Back in Melbourne with us
This women got to leave prison, then straight away, got pregnant and god only knows what's happening to that poor child.

Since that day my mum has been full time guardian to my nephew Chris who is severely autistic and due to the trauma he suffered he does not speak. Not only does she care for him but she's put everything she's got into protecting him and making sure he is surrounded by love and support.

And she has achieved that 10 fold. I hate to think what Chris' life would be like had she not saved him for the hell he was in.

At 15 my world was turned up side down. I can't begin to explain what it was like to live with something like this. I didn't have a childhood like the other kids my age did. I was a full time Aunty and my nights and weekends were spent looking after Chris.

Now, I'm nearly 25. I still live with and look after Chris daily and enjoy every second of it. He is the most amazing boy and I love to watch him achieve the things he has. He is living his life for two and making the most of every second of every day.



Warrandyte Cemetery
Yesterday my family had to stay strong and get through the hardest day we've ever had to live, and continue to be reminded about on the 30th of July every year.
We all had our own little way of remembering her, did our own special little thing.

The weather was nice in Warrandyte this Saturday. It always seems to be a nice day when I go to visit her. BJ and I planned to spend the day out together in Warrandyte and do whatever we wanted.


We went to visit Beanca's grave with some trinkets and flowers and then went and wondered the shops and had a nice quiet lunch together. After that I took BJ somewhere special.. Somewhere that i haven't been for 10 and 1/2 years. The place we took Beanca the last time we saw her. Pound Bend.


My rock - BJ
I don't know why but I felt I needed to go back that and it's a place I wanted to share with BJ. He's been there for me the past 7 years. Holding my hand and supporting me through it all.

I would never wish a tragedy like this on anyone ever.
I will never be able to move past this as it's changed my life in so many ways.

I'm thankful for all our family and friends who have stuck by us and supported us through days like this. It means so much to us to have so many who care about Chris and are looking out for his future.


The things I've remembered coming up to the 10th anniversary of Beanca's death amaze me. I can remember every little thing about her funeral, What i was planning to wear and what i ended up wearing. I remember who was there. I remember the tv show i was watching that night before mum sat us down to tell us what had happened. It's all soo clear like it was only yesterday.


I could go on for hours going into detail about the trails, hearings, appeals, newspaper articles, news reports, our experience with The Australian Story, and a million other things that came from this but I don't want to overload you all. I'm sure in the future i will probably do some others on this but for now... This is enough.


Chris and I - 2011
I'm happy to talk about it with anyone who wants to, or answer questions if you have them.
I learnt very young that I needed to just be open about it all. If people couldn't handle it, that was there problem. But if we didn't speak out about it, we would never have gotten sooo much support from people.

So there is an insight to my world.

xx
Smorgy


Fly free with the Butterflies Beanca xo
Pin It

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Fork This - Episode 8

In this episode of Fork This, BJ and I show you a strange and amazing places we visited in Madison, Wisconsin last year. 

Fork This - 008 from BJ Carter on Vimeo.



It was called Dead Pals of Sam Sanfillippo (We have a little bit of trouble remembering the correct name on the video.)

You can read a bit about this interesting place here.

It didn't have any set open hours. You would have to call each day to find out if there were any 'surprise' funeral's and if they had nothing booked you could just show up and a weird guy will direct you to the basement. 

It was a strange place. Having these rooms downstairs filled with dead, taxidermy animals propped and posed all over the place. But it was amazing.

Check out the photos we took by going to my Flickr set.

The best part about this place was that most of it was out in the open, Not behind glass... So you could really get up close and see the detail.

xx
Smorgy  Pin It

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Fork This - Episode 7

In this episode BJ and I get matching tattoos on our fingers.


Fork This - 007 from BJ Carter on Vimeo. Pin It

Saturday, July 16, 2011

A Tiny Blog and Mutilated Lips 4

This weekend BJ is away on a boys weekend and I'm hoping i might actually get a little creative. Which hasn't happened for a while now.

I have plans for a blog tomorrow when i upload the new episode of Fork This so this is just a little blog with a Mutilated Lips for you to enjoy.

xx
Smorgy

Pin It

Monday, July 11, 2011

Tattoo Sunday

BJ and I decided we wanted to get matching tattoos. Of something that makes sense only to us.
Something personal and special.

And this weekend we went and got our matching tattoos..... On our fingers!!

We got a lot of people voicing there opinions about us getting finger tattoos but to us none of them made any difference when it came to us making this decision.

For me personally I wasn't going to get something huge, in-your-face or stupid. I was going to get something special. Something that no matter what, at any time of day i can look down and see... Something that will always put a smile on my face.

So we go the Pi symbol.


BJ got his in Black (as well as a lightening bolt on his other hand) and I got mine in Pink.



Keep your pies away from us as these are our Pi dipping fingers!

xx
Smorgy

P.S: There may be a Fork This epsiode about this coming soon :) Pin It

Fork This Episode 6

Here is the latest episode of Fork This.

Our friends from Nashville, TN sent over a little care package for us and we unveiled it all infront of the camera for you.
Make sure you watch till the end to see some funny Cooper footage.

xx
Smorgy


Fork This - 006 from BJ Carter on Vimeo. Pin It