Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Dem Pregnant Feelz

I honestly thought that I would be waaay more emotional when I got pregnant.

Don't get me wrong. I've had some emotional breakdowns over the past couple of months but I thought with all the hormones going crazy inside me that I'd just start crying uncontrollably or getting mad over stupid little things.

For the most part this hasn't been the case. Even though I have been soo frustrated, feeling sick all the time I haven't had too many moments where I felt like 'Why did I just start crying?!'

One evening I had a panic attack come out of nowhere. The only reason I can think of is because I struggling to eat the dinner BJ had prepared for me. I ended up getting into such a state that I vomited what little I had eaten and then I cried for about an hour because I broke my puke streak.

And on one of the days that I wasn't able to do much of anything due to lack of energy and feeling like death, I found myself crying in bed while I watched this video on my phone.



It's the stupidest thing and I have no idea why but even now just checking that I had the right video, I've gotten a little teary. 

Damn you Bruno Mars!

xx
Smorgy


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Saturday, March 7, 2015

Touring September 2015

A week ago BJ and I decided to announce our big 2015 news and we were overwhelmed with the a bombardment of congratulations, excitement and support. Thank you everyone!


I am now just shy of 14 weeks pregnant and let me tell you it has been a rough couple of months. BJ and I have known since I was only 4 weeks along and in week 5 I was already starting to feel quite under the weather. By week 7 I couldn't keep much food down and when week 8 hit I couldn't even stomach anything, not even water. 

Week 9 began with me going to the emergency room for some much needed fluids. A 3 hour wait before I was given a bed, by this point it was 10pm. I was soo dry that it took 4 attempts before the they successfully got a vein... and then the fluids began. After the first bag i felt hungry and got given some midnight sandwiches. The second bag of fluids had me drinking water again and after the third I was feeling much better.

That was a rough night. BJ was home looking after the boys and worrying about me while mum was by my side asleep in an uncomfortable armchair. She stayed with me until 7.30am the next morning then not long after BJ joined me and entertained me until it was time to go home.

I was covered in bruises and still feel very weak and empty, which isn't surprising since I lost about 10kg over my first trimester. But after some good advice from the doctor I finally found the way to manage how I was feeling. 

I have missed quite a lot of work these last two months which has not helped me feel better because I'm constantly worrying about falling behind (which I have... A LOT!)

My mum (and Boss) has been soo supportive and helpful throughout all this and I'm soo thankful for that.

But I have also had BJ here looking after me. He has stepped up and just taken control of our household. From the food shops to cooking dinners to cleaning and running around for me. He has been soo amazing. I'm pretty lucky. 

Each week he will come who with the shopping and a special treat for me to try and make me feel better. He's kept the washing under control and this week he even did a heap of painting. He makes my lunch and fills my scripts. He is the best husband I could ask for and I am so lucky to have him while I go through all this.

Right now I can hear him cleaning and organising stuff in the other room while I lay here in bed at 11.37am on a Saturday with my two fluffy boys cuddling up with me for warmth, nibbling on original potato chips for breakfast because that's what the baby wants. 

I hoped that when we finally told everyone a weight would be lifted and I would just start feeling back to normal. I am definitely better then I have been but still have a bit to go before I can get myself moving in the mornings and cook my own food and just stand on my feet for more then 5 minutes. 

I haven't been able to write about anything lately, stayed pretty quiet on Facebook because the only thing I had to say was that I felt sick. It was a challenge to keep the secret, a lot of family members guessed because the 'Megan's sick' excuse got a bit old very quickly. Fork This has been on a hiatus because we really haven't been doing anything worth filming. 

I hope that all that will change soon. 

xx
Smorgy

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